its the lnpt season….and frankly, i never agree wif this sytem…so hows this system is efficient…now u tell me…its more like…its either ur boss like u or not….and being human….how easy man tends to be bias and prejudice..

and wif all of this factor…i wonder how this system wud distinguish in between professionalism and personal…its more of either the bos like u or not…fair enuff if the bos loves u , but do contemplate if u were to be the victim, in which whateva u do, ur boss is the fault finder in ur actions….

and of course, ur lnpt will be affected…

i just dont get it how and why this sytem has been created…i am more a believer of indicator….u do how many reports per year, how many projects….more of objective evidence believer…

am not trying to be utopia…am just hoping there wud be a system that cud eliminate all the potentialities of prejudice….malaysian compared to other nation always have the tendency to membodek @ kissing the ass…and i hopefully there wud be a system in government that cud defy any possibilities that leads to it… i hope….

hope is always a waking dream….

my nerves have been so haywiredddddddddddddddddddddd……in distinguishing in between dreams, hope, expectation….

am trying to fit in this one being’s syndrome who has been so eager to differentiate in between these 3 terms.

rizuan in his last entry wrote that time will heal the wounds…in some sense i do agree…no matter how hard u try to differentiate, its still there…no matter how hard u try to justify, its still there….and worst case scenario, no matter how hard u try to rebounce, the scar remains…

i am a different person today, a great leap from last 2 weeks…had nothing to boast actually, but the fact that i rebounced within few days time was quite impressing…. 

i have learnt one thing…and i beg to differ from one of my best friend who said that u can dream, but never hope or expects…nah…as for me…though my hope had once crushed into pieces, i dont think i’d ever give up any hope again…i wud probably hope and hope again…but one thing for sure, i dont think i wud expect anything for sure….

after all, life is all about uncertainties….because if it were not for hopes, the heart would break and fall and will never heal….

Hope is a waking dream.
* Aristotle

i have learnt one thing on last wednesday evening…that when ur expection wasnt met, u’d be frustrated.

but i guess, that was yesterday, its tuesday now, am all healed up…yesterday was a history, and of course today is all better than yesterday….

Yesterday, a friend was asking me the difference in between expectation and hope…i answered:

• hope is u wanted something, hoping it will come true without any certainty….but when u expect something, it drives u so much to achieve it…u anticipate so much for it to happen

my answered was denied. accordingly, hope and expectation are the same…

according to online dictionary hope is defined as the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best:

while expectation is defined as to look forward to; regard as likely to happen; anticipate the occurrence or the coming of or to look for with reason or justification.

and then i was asked again, what have i expected?

i never want to answer that…

its more of, i hope to win but u cant always expect to win…after all life is all about uncertainties.