i almost cried yesterday, a close friend (yes, i regard her as my close fren ya…not just a fren of a fren!) of mine’s maid run away last evening, calling me weeping…her maid left her son alone outside…and he was sobbing all evening waiting for his mom to rescue him…ciannye hakim!

i find it was very heartbreaking…u know, she having the status of single mother and all. and looking at his son crying hardly, it was difficult for me to console her even. it was quite lucky she has her cousin to at least assist her last nite.

well, the prob started as her maid had begun to marah-marah and menghempan brg towards her, the majikan. and this fren of mine, as weird as u may think, is always afraid to go home…her maid constantly raised her voice everytime she were given a task, and handling things loudly, showing off her ill-tampered…

on one perspective, maybe its always better she went off herself, i mean its always has been great thing to leave hakim all alone rather than abducted him, and though by evening hakim looked desperately hungry, it always better than shedding tears for his lost.

maybe its time for me to reckon ani’s contribution. of course, she isnt perfect. however, to compare to other maid (no…never compare wif ucu’s maid…they are much much better), ani strikes better. there are some task that she had done without any hesitation or grumblings. well even she probably has, she didnt show any infront of me. Godwilling, i hope this maid prob be hindered from me….

to think on one side, maybe for every price we pay, there’s always an added value to it…

however, a lesson learnt for me today …never hire someone whose rejected…even if it saves ur penny, but hell, it’ll cause u madness.

p/s: i smiled at ani when she opened up the door me…the smile was for-thank goodness u are still here, still obliging….and mum…tq for without fails inpecting ani too….i cudnt have done it without u….

i wanted to start a new hobby, trying to do sth on my own, having time for myself…however, what is the new hobby has yet to be decided. i reasoned to everyone, that time has been a hindrance. unanimously, everyone claimed that time shudnt be a factor; as being told, i shud have created the time….despite of retail theraphy, i am into nothing….retail theraphy will cost me a bomb…and that i shall spare for my…u know…down part thingy!

i frankly doesnt know how people have so much time for themselves…its either me who doesnt know how to manage time efficiently, or them who priotize things differently.

in my normal days, i’d usually reaching home at around 730pm…since nowadays i dont cook (moms cooking everyday). and so after maghrib prayers, luqman’s usual routine will be playing kejar-kejar, which probably cost me an hour.

dinner and all, and breastfeeding luqman…will lead to 10 sth….and by 11pm, i’d be heading bed….and so therefore, i have no idea where my new hobby shud slipped in!

weekends wud be even worst…its either kjaya or seremban…and if its in kjaya, its time to bring luqman for his playlands. and wif all the act includes in, by the time on sunday nite, i’d flatten out!

so how shud i prioritize my new hobby…facial was now alien to me, and i’ve thot of slimming, which i still have no idea, when shall i start…or even i proposed to AD, that we shud have started gym…and though so many ideas have coming in…its still an impasse…till today that new hobby has never created…

however, i figure out there is never a win-win situation…its either i make time for luqman or i make time for my new hobby, there’ll always an area that probably be lefted out a lil bit…and of course, being married, family and all, reaching equilibrium in all aspects was actually unattainable.

and as i write these, am still contemplating…

Not in the mood of updating….furthermore there is nothing to update…lost of words really!

Sharifah Hamidah was born on 19th May 197*. having cheeky character, i was introduced to her around year 2002, sharing the same room during ptd assesment centre…she was pretty quiet-that my first impression. well, she was small, petite and quiet…

and then, was in 2003, our acquaintance was rekindled, when we were both appointed as p*d. having the same sidang all-having the same fate that we need to bergerak from one state to another gave us the space to know pah better…

well today in 2007, i wud say, that she has been a remarkable fren all these while…and today, on the 17th July 2007, she’d be leaving for australia… which, on one part, i am happy for her; for furthering master, for having her wish to “migrate” temporarily came true…but on the other story, we’ll definitely be missing cheeky!

To pah:
I sincerely hope luck will be in ur side and may the trouble be always a stranger to u….best wishes for the next 18 months…and hey, its a no no permanent migration ya!

p/s: Don’t be dismayed at goodbyes. 
A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. 
And meeting again, after moments or lifetime, is certain for those who are friends. 

a         : hello…how are you ?
b         : am fine thank you…
a         : anything happened so far? did u go blank? any headache, pain etc?
b         : nope so far….i tend to forget though…is it normal?
a         : it is…its an impact for taking such drugs for a long period of time.
b         : do u think i’d forget more and more after this? can i lower my dose?

a          : am sorry u cant, or maybe i ’d lower it at the end of 2008 ok?…i dont think u’d forget more, however its always better than going blank like what u had rite? why-u worried? dont worry too much…u gonna be fine…do come back to me if there’s “anything” happen ok….or else i’ll see u again at the next appointment

***************and there was a long pause…****************

I was called by the Sub just a minute ago, insisting that we, the people who didnt attend the teambuilding prog at cherating last weekend to prepare an assigment entitled” why shud i be remained at bhg kewangan, and what contribution shall i  bring to the bahagian…”

 on an emotional note, i frankly doesnt mind, if i were to be transfered to other division…well reason being…being in the kewangan was always hectic…and headaches…ad, zaza are among my frens whom i know have tried kewangan, and yup…it is frenzied…

and of course, i dont think i wud ever lobby anyone, just to be in kewangan…though i admit, its operational things will never be brought back home, but its volume to process is overwhelming…and yes surcaj is always a threat.

nevertheless, if i could turn back the time, i hardly wud join still, because the last weekend was an action packed activities for me, for ad of course-for paksa-ing me to teman her makan sate until i missed my heroes , my family, as well as in laws (especially Jamal n Kamal)…which i was trying to patch things back…and yes to not mention my lovely grandparents…

i presume life was never a win win situation…i managed to redeem my time for my loved ones…and definitely for gud things that come,there is always a price to pay! 

despite of everything, am still sensing on top of the world thingy….still feeling content because i finally met my grandparents last nite, its difficult to describe how fortunate i was seeing their face delighted and it was priceless seeing their eyes, whom have been waiting for me, always hoping for me to be back-looking back at me wif love and care… unaware of the attention that they have long for, from me…..

what come may, i am still grateful for not joining the team building…and dear SUB, you dont know how i have made those old folks felt delighted….and hey, this aint working to tear me down!

p/s: so people, vote me for ur next ksn…coz if i be, never a sat n sunday is a working day for any kakitangan awam….hak hak……(of course, terms and condition applies )